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Baked Oatmeal with Blueberries and Lemon
It’s that time of year where mornings are getting hard. Maybe it’s our S.A.D., or maybe it’s survival instinct hibernation, but we can’t get our asses out of bed. Everything’s grey, and it’s windy, and it’s too cold to put our bare toes on the floor. We always oversleep so there’s no time for the luxuriating over trashy gossip mags with milky coffee that makes our day jobs tenable— but there is time for breakfast.

Baked Oatmeal tastes like cookies. No. Baked Oatmeal tastes better than cookies, because you can eat more of it before you get a tummy ache. With its bright, sunny lemon and juicy blueberries, it can shake the bleak chill off any winter morning. Make a batch on Sunday night and you will have a week of breakfasts that are worth waking up for.

This is one of our many recipes that is a few ratios followed by a couple suggestions. So long as you don’t add wildly different amounts of oats or liquids, there’s no need to be bashful. Fuck around with it. Throw in a handful of walnuts or slivered almonds, swap blueberries for dried cherries, and maybe try classic, comforting maple & cinnamon instead of lemon.


Baked Oatmeal with Blueberries and Lemon
adapted from allrecipes.com

Serves: roughly 8

  • 3 cups Old Fashioned Rolled Oats
  • 1/4 cup whole Flax Seeds
  • 1 cup Brown Sugar
  • 1 Lemon, Zest only
  • 1 tsp Ginger
  • 1/2 tsp Cardamom
  • 3/4 tsp Salt
  • 1 cup Blueberries (or more, if you feel feisty)
  • 1 stick Butter, melted
  • 1 cup Whole Milk
  • 2 Egg, beaten
  • 1 tbsp Vanilla
plus
  • Some ice cold Milk or Half and Half for serving

Preheat your oven to 375°. 

Combine all of the dry ingredients, along with the Blueberries, in a 13x9” casserole dish.

In a small sauce pan, melt the Butter with the Whole Milk. Allow the mixture to cool enough to not curdle shit, and add the Eggs and Vanilla. Thoroughly blend the mixture and pour over the Oats n Stuff.

Give everything a stir, and make sure it’s evenly distributed.

Bake for about 20 minutes, or until set and no longer jiggly.

Serve immediately or allow the Oatmeal to cool to room temperature and stick it in the fridge. Serve warm, topped with some cold Milk (or Half and Half) and maybe a scattering of extra Blueberries

Breakfast Skillet
Eating non-holiday meals during the holidays can be weird. It’s hard to execute a hot meal in the morning when you’re busy, but December means planning for strangely timed meals and the questionable cooking abilities of your loved ones. Along with the usual requisites for food being tasty and satisfying, there’s a balance that must be struck: non-holiday meals need to be nourishing to keep you alert and feeling well enough to face your creepy Republican uncle while you pick at gristly ham and Jell-o salad, but they can’t be so filling that you don’t have room for pie.

Our solution is a gigantic breakfast with plenty of fiber, fat, and protein to keep you satisfied until it’s time for dessert.

Breakfast Skillets are full of the most delicious things on the planet and are our go-to hearty breakfast. Tender potatoes with crisp edges, chunks of meat, deceptive volumes of vegetables, and runny eggs with melty, bubbly cheese are an easy way to leverage hot sauce and ketchup into your face, but they also are nutritionally dense and diverse. Breakfast Skillets are a great way for your body to get some of the vitamins it may have missed during last night’s appetizers-on-a-stick repast and fill you up without making you need a nap. More than that: they are a great way to feed a hungry crowd, like your hungover friends or out of town relatives usurping your couch.
Eat it alone with Cholula and black coffee to correct any ills remaining from yesterday’s eggnog or pair it with Cinnamon-Sugar Pull-Apart Bread  and some fresh OJ for a low-maintenance family breakfast that is so fucking classy, it will make your mother get off your back about finding a job.

Breakfast Skillet

  • 4 slices Thick Cut Bacon (or 4 tbsp Oil)
  • 1 large Yellow Onion
  • 1 lb Red Skinned Potato
  • 1 lb Sweet Potato, peeled
  • 2 cups Kale, torn into bite size pieces
  • 1 Bell Pepper
  • 1/2 cup Mushrooms, sliced
  • 1 clove Garlic
  • Salt and Pepper, to taste
  • 1/2 cup shredded Gruyere or Cheddar Cheese
  • Eggs, however many you want to eat

Serves: at least 4, more if you do some toast or a quickbread


Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.
Slice Bacon into lardons and render until crispy and awesome in your largest, heaviest oven-safe skillet pan. Cast iron skillets are really preferable. You could also do this in a regular pan, and transfer into a casserole dish before you stick it in the oven.
While the Bacon browns, wash and cut the Potatoes into thin, even slices. Roughly chop the Onion, Pepper, and Garlic.
Once the Bacon turns into, you know, Bacon, set it aside, leaving the fat in the pan. Add the Onions and cook over medium low heat until just hardly softened. Add all of the Potatoes, turn up the heat to a medium, and cook for about 15 minutes, only stirring when absolutely necessary. If the pan seems dry, feel free to add some Olive Oil. This is a big-ass dish of hearty potatoes that is meant to stick with you, don’t be bashful.
After the 15 minutes are up, add Garlic and Bell Peppers, and give everything a thorough stir. Taste and season with Salt and Pepper to your preference.
Lay the Kale on top of everything, cover with a lid or cookie sheet, and let the other ingredients steam it for about five minutes, or until the Potatoes are cooked through.
Top with the Cheese and slide it into the oven to brown while you cook your eggs. You can just crack those fuckers right on top and let them do their thing in the oven, but we really love basted eggs because they’re totally idiot proof.

Serve immediately either plain (which is delicious) or with your favorite hot sauce.

Breakfast is a tiny present that we give ourselves everyday. Spending those few minutes in the morning (or, let’s be real, early afternoon) making a small effort to take care of ourselves sets up the rest of the day to feel more satisfying.

It’s not always poached farmers market eggs with olive oil drizzled heirloom tomatoes and toasted whole grain bread, sometimes it’s Poptarts straight from the foil and lukewarm Diet Coke, but it is always a time for us to stop our busy days before they start. Breakfast, for us, is a micro-ritual that gives our days rhythm; it’s starting our day with intention, with a moment set apart just for ourselves, and an affirmation that things will be delicious.